I've spent 9 hours vomitting in the fetal position... how did i stay like this for 9 months?
i love how i spend my mornings exploring my phone to see what i did last night.
I bought a Christmas tree in my drunken state last night, after walking a half mile in search of vino and prior to my apparently playing boardgames with my boyfriend's family. There is no way you are on my level.
Their bromance is so intense that they don't even eye-fuck when they see each other....they eye-make-love.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We started snorting MDMA at 3 in the afternoon...it was never going to end well.
I am willing to take shots of vanilla extract. That's how this night has been.
Dude Eric's high and buying everyone taquitos. How much room do we have in the freezer?
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
The reign of the rally queen is over. Welcome to the age of the walking dead.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm watching sex and the city with my wine and Wendy's. I'm not sure if this is single woman empowerment or not.
hey, being drunk and dumb is my thing. Don't take that away from me.
Idk what y'all are doing but I just want you to know I'm home and if I hear him say "slap it" one more time I'm moving out
Well I just saw a fully naked man doing a headstand in a cooler of ice water.
I was grinding with girl while I was eating french fries, and she turned around to hook up with me. She ate my fries.
St. Patty's shenanigans tmrw? I wanna meet dudes lol. Why stop at coronavirus when you can get the clap, too?
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