Sry I called you an 8
Haha no. But I cannot hook up with you anymore. Especially when you group text people.
I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
you told the bartender not to open the bottle because you were gonna put it in your purse in case you get cut off later
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Don't text me when you know I'm doing lines on my phone
He compared my vagina to the first time he tried cocaine
I think the taxi driver just requested me on facebook..... his name was george right?
This is why i like single justin better. my only regret is not being present for more of his short life. may he rest in peace
Life just isn't the same without him waking me up at 4 in the afternoon with a look of pity on his face...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can vaginas get frostbite?
I'm sure we could make a ball of yarn and a nickel into a drinking game
You know how I said I'd never worry about my roommate? Well I just walked in on her masturbating to Star Trek.
Did she boldly cum where no one has cum before?
I was using my Beauty and the Beast blanket as a makeshift skirt because no pants
no we have a special triathlon I'm entering us in. drinking, fucking, and sleeping. I think we have a good shot.
He propositioned me for a threesome once so yeah I'd say he has what it takes to run for public office
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