I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
I'll have my TA grade the tests, she needs something to do anyway. Wanna race to the bar on segways?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
Plan: drunk dancing. Reality: drunk almost getting in fights with people that could beat me into the ground.
Don't pretend you don't want to dance on the edge of overdose all three nights
I told him I was going to sit on his face after I got out of the shower, he threw up the arm boners and yelled "STEVE HOLT!!" I might actually stop sleeping with other dudes.
I was just thinking about our drunk conversation about having sex with elephants the other night. Love you bud. Stay strong.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have so many feelings about this burrito
It's like jay gatsby himself preordained that our genitals meet again.
I'm talking to a corgi on tinder..wtf has my life come to
I think I'm dead. Also I think I stole $20 from a stripper.
You did. Then gave it to me.
My uterus just tried to get me to buy a tub of cookie dough
Well it was okay until he pinned my arms over my head and I found the loaded pistol tucked behind the bed... THIS IS WHY WE DON'T FUCK BOYS IN MONTANA ANYMORE
Randomize