I thought I was riding a bike, but I guess it was a vacuum cleaner
What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Text me if you also stopped reading harry potter in the 4th grade and wanna go to the bars tonight instead of the midnight premiere
I'm studying for my midterm by watching porn with Spanish subtitles. Surprisingly the words are still really distracting..
Dating Detox Day 5: had to go out and buy new batteries. this may be harder than I thought
If I believed in "responsibility" and "having limits", I would probably say I consumed too much alcohol in the last 48 hours
just gonna show up naked this time. that way i dont have to worry about finding my clothes tomorrow
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I IMAGINED YOU YELLING SURPRISE WITH JAZZ HANDS. AND I LOVE YOU FOREVER
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
If I don't get my shit together, I'm going to be one of those really fucked up cases on 1000 ways to die
You faceplanted on the railroad tracks and when I tried to tell you to get up, you told me you were "taking a quick breather"
What? I'll do just about anything if you give me a sticker.
is it sad that the highlight of my saturday night was waiting till 3 in the morning to hear about your saturday night?
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