lets hang out tonight and do stupid stuff.
Dating you for 6 months was stupid enough. But thanks.
We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you haven't felt a hangover until you wake up after a night of snorting tequila.
Banged a lazy eyed chick last night. It was like fucking an iguana.
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
Her boyfriend only talks to me because I know her period schedule
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you think royal wedding drunk calls for wine or tequila?
Been home for 3 days and already spiked coffee with Kahlua. Only 106 till we go back to school
At a bar across from the city police station. I PROMISE I will do something great.
My plan for the weekend: 1) Get shit faced in Vegas. 2) Not die
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
I told him to take his man panties off and take the fucking Jaeger bomb already, so no to a 2nd date
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