There needs to be a term for a female version of a rusty trombone
just because she blew him doesn't mean she knows his name.
During the middle of giving him head, he flashes his phone and says "I like to watch."
in case you havent found it already in honor of Toy story 3 we wrote ANDY on the bottom of your foot while you were passed out on the couch.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
Something smells like weed and I think it might be my mascara. Come sniff my eyes
Just had a flash back. Pretty sure i ate toilet paper last night.
Mym mom just came downstairs as I got ghome ans I'm trying to act SO CASUAL as i stabdh here hut icant help bur be like 'girl where's ther Turkey sandwiche s' haahaa
I literally need you to talke care of me soooo9o9oooooo drubj gril makin a sabdwiche. SO far its judst bred and paper towel...
is it mean that i live tweeted about whether or not my roommate and her bf were having sex or were wrestling?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You peed on someones bathroom floor while saying people are rude for not flushing
I wouldn't call that a crush. It was more of a minor brain aneurism.
I'm only wearing socks and eating tuna, don't do this to me right now.
either he just commented on my nose ring or he's offering me cocaine, I honestly can't tell
I'm still alive btw, in case you were worried about my well being.
I just saw a raccoon get launched out of a tree by another raccoon. They have turf wars...
Randomize