I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
I cannot stress to you how much better your current situation is than listening to gay sex
I am literally too baked to press the call button. How am I supposed to bone him?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We need to get her some penis inspired head protection.
He's coming back with me for the week. It took me saying "I don't wanna drive myself home... I'm better as a passenger giving road head" for him to jump at it. Rack another one up for my magical openings.
do you have any idea how hard it is to keep a boner while another dude is writing on your dick in sharpie?
Haha at least the one I have like that you can't tell we are completely drunk and you're about to kick a glass out of my hand in a fit of joy over pizza.
that was THE gayest party i've ever been to
To be fair, the theme was Cabaret. I don't know what you were expecting.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're the reason I lose Never Have I Ever
I'm a 23 year old adult who just ordered condoms online from Target because I'm still too embarrassed to buy them in the store.
For new year's, we should just keep our resolution simple and keep accomplishing burpees in heels.... while drunk.
He somehow always manages to get me naked within 5 minutes of being together. It's like fucking witchcraft.
I found a tomato seed inside my jeans. I did not eat tomatoes
Three cheers for handling my crush on my boss in an entirely reasonable manner, by having a threesome with my coworkers.
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