Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
Someone should tell Glenda that I only hang with her because she makes me look prettier.
i like that you affectionately refer to him as "creepy" ever time you talk about him
shut up i haven't hooked up with anyone since 45 minutes ago
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
You would think that me seductively unzipping my cat feetie pajamas would make him want to fuck me.
Omg one side of my Labia is asleep. Has that ever happened to you?
Look outside and see if the septic tank explodes when I flush this.
Oh Jesus. Are you going to the hospital?
No I'm showering then leaving for Vegas
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just remembered I made you punch yourself in the face last night and I would like to formally apologize for that even though it was hilarious.
Idk woke up on the suite in someone else's clothing and actually broke my ankle
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
Remember when you brought a guy home from the bar... to our parents house.... on thanksgiving eve?
I just shook glitter of my birth control packet so I’d say it’s safe to say it was a good weekend
And now, by the power vested in me by the state of intoxication, I now pronounce you fucking awesome.
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