DUDE DUDE I JUST GOT TH E BEST IDEA FOR A CHILDRENS BOOK "If You Give A Girl A Blow Job"
And then falling down drunk the next morning, concussing yourself and splitting your head open?
That was pretty sad, but you more than made up for it by using "concussing" in a sentence
Remind me that when I'm pregnant, I should NOT post vaginal dilation updates on my facebook. Ever.
i upgraded from drunk texts to drunk e-mails...real world here i come
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
i was mowing the lawn and found the coffee pot in the bushes
Just made hot dog dorito pasta. It happened.
Dude, smoked out of a pumpkin tonight. I like Halloween more now
So he was supposed to be helping me with my math but instead we ended up drinking coconut rum in his basement and having sex. I think my mom was right, getting a tutor will be good for me. Relieves the stress.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think ur a lot drunker then u think u are. That girl has the body of a cartoon character and not in a good way.
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
I consider myself to be an upstream bisexual
You're the salmon of the gays...
It wasn't a great time! You grabbed me, picked me up, and make me pee in the sink!
What did the sign say that bob stapled to his ass?
At least you got some excitement going on, you got weed and might die tonight, I'm just sitting here bored as fuck.
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