What was that guy's name that you dated that wore the leotard?
he sent her a picture of his penis to show that he "trusts her" or some shit like that..well she showed it to me, and let me just tell you..it looked like a freaking slug or something. creepiest penis i've ever seen. hands down
Just saw a cop issuing a DUI. At 3 pm. It's definitely the start of winter break.
I'm gonna laugh so hard when we're both married with families
That statement alone makes me laugh so hard.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The amount of pregnancy tests I've taken in my life is unhealthy
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
I don't remember anything but yelling at the ref in Spanish.
I have to fuck proof my bed. It was in the middle of the room this time.
Listen, it's not like I meant to bust the window out. It just sort of happened. And I'm also sorry for stealing your dads bandanas.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I I know is that there's 2 new contacts in my phone. Drunk Backdoor and Gayass Handshake. Thanks, Jameson.
Why did the fire extinguisher taste lemony?
All I remember is passing out with an umbrella over my head and waking up screaming bad luck for seven years
don't get you morals all over my torrid fantasties
and Katie got too high with the tow truck driver and wants to go home
I got so drunk I thought my tennis court was a corn field so I laid in it and ate pizza
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