Excuse me do you have gonnorhea?
I just had a 2 1/2 hr conversation about the pros and cons of taping your ballsack to your taint, which then led into the unveilling of lady gaga being a hermaphrodite.
your tears are not going to buy me drinks...
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I knew you would eventually ask my secret. Pedialite mix drinks. Works wonders.
I just want to let you know that when you try and lie about the "solid 10" you brought home last night, I've got a picture of her and about 10 reasons you should have left her at the bar starting with those martin scorsese eyebrows.
He never answered about passing his structures test no matter how I asked him. He did send a text saying that he would be "pouring alcohol into his head and balls" so I'm guessing he has to retake the whole class.
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
IT IS EARTH DAY, RECORD STORE DAY, 4/20 EVE, AND SATURDAY ALL AT THE SAME TIME!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She had sex with a starfish painted on her face. Thank you Halloween
At least I got steroids and a baguette out of the deal
Don't trim your pubes if you've been drinking. I can't believe I have to tell you more than once.
I woke up with my my shoes on and pants half way off and missing 60 dollars. Please please please tell me you saw me last night.
They're doing CPR to someone in the middle of Victoria's Secret. Way to block the undies, damnit!
Dude i just passed out while getting head...she cried
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