Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
In a bar in glasgow talking to a 12 year old about life. Welcome to Kentucky.
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
I've decided to turn your sobriety into a reason for me to be able to drink more.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He poured all of the vodka into the sweet tea and said that tomorrow it would be called 'surprise drunk.' then we had sex.
My dream of liquor pitchers came true
My mouth feels like I've been chewing on leather and firecrackers for the past 3 days
You know it's a good Halloween party when a guy wearing a light-up sombrero offers you blow.
Is it malicious or apart of the healing process if I wipe my ass with his toothbrush?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That moment half way through a run when you realize you have to take a giant shit. I was racing against my bowels that last mile. Now my sweat is suctioning my ass to this toilet seat. Enjoy that NSA.
You climbed out your own window and walked in the front door..
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
Yeah but him not going to be sleeping in your sink this time.
Holy shit last night was like the irresponsible Olympics for me
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
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