3:38a: you guys up to anything right now?
Oh fyi, I gave your card to a homeless guy last night and told him you were the world's hottest blonde girl who only likes black men...Sorry
We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
what about "I will fuck you for a jamba juice" do you not understand?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
on of the only things i remember was the security guard told me i was too drunk for laser tag.
Lost is over, my longest committed relationship is coming to an end.
he met me at the airport with a welcome home sign with a grilled cheese, PBR and a blow job on it. i missed america.
Yea, you were talking about how you did not want to be a reindeer for at least 5 minutes.
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And then I told him since the day he walked away to get over what I went through he lost the boyfriend right to ask why my bed is broken.
I take full pride in being the one that broke ur bed. Want to go for the sofa?
Everytime Our professor said "penis fencing" in class today we took shots.
I think he's like Cher he's going to live forever but not as scary looking
I had sex on a seadoo on the middle of the lake lastnight
How much weed can I reasonably smoke now if I have to leave for work in a bit over an hour
I have to close one eye, because I don't wanna see two movies, I only want to see one.
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