Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
Pretty girls always come out on top. Or bottom. Whatever. Point is we come out with their boyfriends.
no. the fact that it's halloween completely overrides the fact that it's sunday. youre going out whether im dragging your boring ass or not.
The meeting is at the same hotel we go to for sex. Avoiding eye contact with all the staff there.
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I have got to stop getting laid on my lunch breaks. I AM SO HUNGRY RIGHT NOW.
True as that may be, are you coming to the birth of my imaginary child or not?
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
I told them the reason I passed out was because of "heat exhaustion." Not from showing up drunk. Good thing this is Arizona.
I will pray to the gods of eye bleach for you
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There is a large scratch and bruise about the size of a pizza bagel next to my vagina. Please text back if you know what happened.
We ended up at a lesbian bar and all my co-workers tried to get me laid. This is not how I envisioned coming out.
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
But truly, sorry about your empty vagina
Thanks boo.
I feel like I may be the only person who can say they crutched their walk of shame. past the secret service.
This can only be settled by a dance off.
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