hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
Please, let me fuck your mom
Someone shit on the floor
the ex, the guy i cheated on the ex with and the rebound are about to form a beer pong team at my party. is it bad i feel accomplished my pussy brought their union together?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He kissed my cheek and I could smell it the whole way home like shit
The cab driver doesn't know where we can find an empire state building shaped dildo either!? What is wrong with NYC!?
we've been together for three years, and i still get excited when i know i'm going to give him a blow job. it's that kind of love
i have a raging boner for Saturday, day drinking is one of my top favorite things right next to alligator wrestling and blowing shit up
Just do it. I grew some lady balls and did it last year. It's your turn. Time to show what you're made of. Hit it or quit it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I walked into a room this morning and someone asked how my back was because I apparently threw myself off the porch after attempting to set myself on fire. Who the fuck let drunk me play with fire?!
Better question: who the fuck planted a tree next to the porch?!
He told me I smelled like fruit loops and then bit me on the tit
I haven't been dieting for my entire life to date some guy who thinks his dad bod is a riot.
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
Update: drank half a bottle of Bourbon and texted three ex's. Waiting for the roommates to go to sleep so I can raid the fridge.
What the fuck were you guys talking about?
Lube wrestling.
Oh, makes sense.
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