Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (734): View more from Michigan

  I'm pants shitting drunk right now

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (734): I'm pants shitting drunk right now http://tfl.nu/z85l
  Replies (4) Good night (725) Bad night (779) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (540): View more from Virginia

  Sometimes I think its so cool that a dick that has been inside kate moss has also been inside me. So exciting.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (540): Sometimes I think its so cool that a dick that has been inside kate moss has also been inside me. So exciting. http://tfl.nu/24nu
  Replies (56) Good night (7571) Bad night (1119) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (216): View more from Ohio

  when i woke up i was missing $380 from my bank account

  (1-216): View more from Ohio

  damn...impressive bar tab

  (216): View more from Ohio

  no i guess i bought a gasoline powered blender off ebay, i need a breathalyzer for my computer

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (216): when i woke up i was missing $380 from my bank account (1-216): damn...impressive bar tab (216): no i guess i bought a gasoline powered blender off ebay, i need a breathalyzer for my computer http://tfl.nu/hyvf
  Replies (13) Good night (1144) Bad night (1851)
• Favorite

  (415): View more from California

  No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (415): No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love." http://tfl.nu/xky8
  Replies (91) Good night (4424) Bad night (1145) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (757): View more from Virginia

  ejected that DVD during the department meeting.. it was our porn from last night. I have a new nick-name at work.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (757): ejected that DVD during the department meeting.. it was our porn from last night. I have a new nick-name at work. http://tfl.nu/i4i5
  Replies (13) Good night (966) Bad night (3711) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (919): View more from North Carolina

  You said you were collecting Asians for your Kate Gosselin costume.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (919): You said you were collecting Asians for your Kate Gosselin costume. http://tfl.nu/gckc
  Replies (46) Good night (13098) Bad night (809) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (616): View more from Michigan

  I just spent a chunk of my Christmas money on Plan B. I don't think that's what my relatives had mind when they said "spend it wisely", but hey, it was a good investment considering the bad life choices i made last night.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (616): I just spent a chunk of my Christmas money on Plan B. I don't think that's what my relatives had mind when they said "spend it wisely", but hey, it was a good investment considering the bad life choices i made last night. http://tfl.nu/m0ls
  Replies (68) Good night (2021) Bad night (3839)
• Favorite

  (860): View more from Connecticut

  I wrote and sealed my mom's mothers day card last night while intoxicated.. should i put it in the maibox

  (1-860): View more from Connecticut

  without a question

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (860): I wrote and sealed my mom's mothers day card last night while intoxicated.. should i put it in the maibox (1-860): without a question http://tfl.nu/lm2z
  Replies (10) Good night (4091) Bad night (796) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (860): View more from Connecticut

  failed my one goal of the day: wake up before 2 pm.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (860): failed my one goal of the day: wake up before 2 pm. http://tfl.nu/gfgw
  Replies (13) Good night (4716) Bad night (1389) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (515): View more from Iowa

  then she stuck her tongue in my ass

  (1-515): View more from Iowa

  I thought we were talking about reason you aren't going to marry her?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (515): then she stuck her tongue in my ass (1-515): I thought we were talking about reason you aren't going to marry her? http://tfl.nu/wzc5
  Replies (18) Good night (3634) Bad night (1951) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (202): View more from Washington, DC

  I need to have sex with you on our hotel room window ledge... This is a need not a request.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (202): I need to have sex with you on our hotel room window ledge... This is a need not a request. http://tfl.nu/ivj5
  Replies (5) Good night (3317) Bad night (901) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (720): View more from Colorado

  You beat him at the shot competition, and proceeded to rub it in while telling everyone to "ASK ME A MATH QUESTION!!!"

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (720): You beat him at the shot competition, and proceeded to rub it in while telling everyone to "ASK ME A MATH QUESTION!!!" http://tfl.nu/9zop
  Replies (10) Good night (2243) Bad night (564) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (706): View more from Georgia

  Is re-gifting a Valentine's Day present worse than re-gifting a Xmas one?

  (1-706): View more from Georgia

  You're unbelievable, unbelievably awesome.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (706): Is re-gifting a Valentine's Day present worse than re-gifting a Xmas one? (1-706): You're unbelievable, unbelievably awesome. http://tfl.nu/97og
  Replies (4) Good night (738) Bad night (244) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (434): View more from Virginia

  I met her at the quidditch match. She was the snitch and I caught her. After at the bar she walked up grabbed my hand and said snitches have flesh memories.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (434): I met her at the quidditch match. She was the snitch and I caught her. After at the bar she walked up grabbed my hand and said snitches have flesh memories. http://tfl.nu/op72
  Replies (6) Good night (1866) Bad night (214)
• Favorite

  (651): View more from Minnesota

  You've thrown off my entire schedule. Usually SATURDAYS are my "try to hide the jizz on my leggings" days

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (651): You've thrown off my entire schedule. Usually SATURDAYS are my "try to hide the jizz on my leggings" days http://tfl.nu/dsf3
  Replies (4) Good night (482) Bad night (309) Order T-Shirt

Randomize