it's like sucking your thumb. only its not yours. and its a penis.
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
That's what you said about that spiderman stripper, but look how that turned out
My roommate made me go home after I mooed at fat girls at the gas station.
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Do something fun then. Blow up the house or whatever.
How have you survived this long?
Dumb luck and a deal with the devil.
It was the classiest, most strategic and inspired vomiting I've ever witnessed. Like a blind mans first sunrise. A priests first prayer. Or a virgins first orgasm.
Filthy. I need to be power hosed with holy water.
For context, I was hiding under the pong table mooing at everyone by that point.
I need an inhaler full of pot for all of this breathless rage.
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I had a flashback of using my sock as a napkin after we got taco bell
My sobriety has gotten out of control. I think I need an intervention.
If he doesn't get here soon I'm taking off my thong and eating his dinner.
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
I could have been on my second lucrative divorce by now, but nooooo, I had to be a strong independent woman.
Legit just heard the bartender tell some Dude "Penis is not an accepted currency in this establishment" and Dude responded "You take Vagina then?"
Randomize