Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
so he just called his new girlfriend by my name and she was too drunk to even notice how awkward..
8$ liquor pitchers. I'm gonna wear two or three pairs of underwear so when drunk me takes them off there'll still be a pair on.
I do what I can to inject something into your life every day. Today, humor. Saturday. Penis.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't like finding out that my fuck buddy is a good person.
It's like a toaster oven for my penis
A "Tom-vomit" is when you puke but cough as it comes up, so you close you mouth as a natural reaction and the vomit is jet-propelled out your noise.
Holy. Crap. I just found a hickey on my bikini line. He never got my pants off. WHO IS THIS MYSTICAL HOOKUP WIZARD?
So this is where people who peaked in high school come to drink?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I went by my nickname in rehab. It made it feel more like summer camp.
He reached a whole new level of creepy. We were getting a coffee and he noticed the girl at Starbucks name tag looked her up on fb and friend requested her right there without ever introducing himself
Can't decide if it was more awkward buying sheets together or disposing of them afterwards
"Why is there a bottle of Tequila taped to the fan?"
this bedazzled flask is my best investment yet
His mom just pulled off a quadruple cockblock. I'm not sure if I'm mad or impressed?
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