i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
apparently i was offering everyone ambien and shouting, it's only like heath ledger if you want it to be!
Stuck in the Dallas airport. At the bar. Everytime a flight to DC gets cancelled, I'm takin a shot. Fuck you snow.
just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just headbutted a photographer. This convention just got really interesting.
i want to be friends with one of those mini shredded wheat men.
Careful, it's a slippery slope to discovering you're bisexual...trust me.
You said that we all need to "head out like a boner through sweatpants and get fucked." Jager night was a success.
I think I've just evolved into some kind of vodka fueled monster
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah yeah, I don't care. I bought a super soaker, so lets please go attracting attention by spraying each other while wearing white tank tops?
Side note: Hot guys are now getting with ugly chicks. Alert the media.
Shit my boyfriend's roommate thinks thinks: I love getting woken up to the sound of my roommate getting a blowjob
Then. Omg he showed me A CARD TRICK AFTER WE CAME
The good news is I woke up fully clothed, on top of my covers, with a half eaten granola bar. So, breakfast was waiting for me and I’m already dressed and ready to go today.
The fuck kind of sorcerer makes a pact with tequila
Most of the people I know from AA
Haha touché
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