Are you kidding me. My sex life has diminshed to having wet dreams about jerking off.
got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
just watched paranormal activity stoned. laughed the whole time and screamed when they turned on the lights. eating doritos. I love my life
her roommate was in the bathroom for over an hour so i volunteered to take the dog out and i shit in the bushes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My gym is having a pizza and beer party. God im starting to love this place.
Just woke up with three stitches in my left boob. Nevertheless, I think I'm going to like this school.
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
i would bitch about being this hungover, but honestly im just happy to be alive after this weekend
I'm okay.. I had a good heart to heart with the cab driver Raheem - it's going to be our year.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You demanded I give you a glass of water, so I set it down in front of you and you knock it over and roll in it..,
I wanted to be a dolphin.
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
He told me he was married and then fingered me on the kitchen counter. It was awkward to explaining the broken toaster to my roommates this morning...
You asked to borrow my glasses for a moment. Then you whipped them at someone's head.
I didn't even know we were hiding from the cops, I was just playing with the cats. People kept telling me to be quiet the cops are here and I was like DID YOU SEE THIS CAT!?
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