You know that restaurant that is like over by home depot?
That shitty one? I heard the food sucks there
It's my parent's restaurant
I found the seven page love letter I had written you. I'm sorry i was so obsessed.
do you remember putting condoms over both your hands and asking me if your fists would be too big.
i found your underwear in my bra... i dont even remember how this happened.
shit. all i remember is the look on your moms face.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
not only did i climb through the window at 4 am but here i am 4 hours later for my interview at the mall and i'm staring in the dark pet store barking at puppies
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
It was one time. Now I have to constantly remind her my name is Jessica not Jizzica.
Before he took off his pants he paused and said, "Remember..sometimes great things come in small packages."
I should probably file for unemployment. Sometime between last night and 4 AM I facebooked my manager the lyrics to hoe by ludacris. I'm just projecting ahead here.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Received a verbal warning at work for "riding in a trash receptacle, violating professionalism & infection control."
I just watched a guy smoke weed through a French Horn. He is my hero
We're not on Beacon Street anymore so now your argument about not peeing on the sidewalk holds no water. Whereas my bladder has holded every water.
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
It's cosmic balancing. My vagina is an instrument of karmic retribution.
I just smoked part of an Oreo cuz I thought it was some hash you left
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