we got so high we spray painted his girlfriend's UGG boots. she's CRYING. it's hysterical.
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
He taped the number 420 over all of his clocks
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Pretty sure I recall hugging our waiter from the bar last night. That also means we are NEVER going there again
Bake him heart shaped cookies?!? Send him a picture of your tits like an ADULT!
I asked my boss to leave early for a booty call. She said yes. See.... everyone sees it's important I get laid.
Right when he asked me if I was on birth control my dad walked in. This is my fate.
I woke up with my face covered in mustard. Your mom said I ate hotdogs like a pornstar
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now Heโs Upset Because People Told His Mom
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
NOBODY TALKS SHIT ABOUT PANDA EXPRESS
๐๐๐ what are we doing to these poor guys?!
Maintaining the status quo.
should i be that dick who brings a carpet in an uberpool
Why are you moving a carpet?
it's unimportant
Dear sober self, your keys are on the table in front of you the only way your typing this is with autocorrect goodnight love you
You donโt need a wing man if you have a solid hook up on the pumpkin pie
Randomize