I think your mom looks like a breed of donkey and elephant, but her boobs are perfect
i saved all my weight watcher points for this alcohol
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Woke up with pink eye in both my eyes. That's how the threesome went
I hope his life after cheating on me is as good as Tiger's golf game is these days.
Bad news is he broke up with me via text message
But the good news is I've returned as mayor of whoreville
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
by "whatever happens, happens" i meant "we are totally hooking up again on tuesday." i thought that was obvious.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was in the library and saw 2 dudes hackysacking in a study room with 3 girls working. I asked if I could join; as soon as I closed the door the chicks offered me tequila shots. study session w/everyone cancelled, I'm busy.
So for future reference.... it's a little unnerving when I can't get hold of you, and the last communication we had was, "Oh fuck... It's tequila"
I can make a sex schedule on Excel and send it to you guys
found a note from drunk me saying "don't worry i fed the mice". WHAT MICE?
The gift for sixth anniversary is steel. He bought me handcuffs. Inee I married the right man!
I texted her mom a picture of us doing it saying "I'm trying to make your daughter just like you!" she was not amused.
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