im pretty sure i just saw someone trying to catch a fish with his penis
Well, what part of "I've heard she has crabs" didn't you take into consideration?
My boobs are too big for things to be going this downhill in my life.
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If you're missing hair this morning, i'm sorry in advance
Good lord, they've set up every firework to be ignited by a trail of gasoline at midnight. God save us all.
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
I would come over if there was not the impending fear of me shitting out my brains.
I. recorded a message of me yelling at myself to "get up out of that bed" and set it an alarm. REALLY loud
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sexting across continents is really a perfect example of how far technology has come.
Sex should not remind me of how baby birds get fed
this hospital has no fireball
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
this isn't the first time drunken padiddle ended in a fist fight..
I just peed on myself the semester has officially began.
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