Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
Last night I had a dream we played Uno and had sex. You won at Uno, but you lost at sex.
Just got a lapdance on the metro. She said she was on maternity leave and needed the practice.
thanks for texting me "so many asians" at 1am...
there were a lot.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Got hereat 8. Had 6 beers 2 shots and a game of diZZY BATOS
Exactly. Because my vagina can't be consoled with words. It requires a thicker form of communication
I may be in the process of acquiring a second male fuck buddy and dating a girl....FUCKING STOP THE TRAIN I'M ON! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!!
This girl just texted me asking me to drop her cheese. What the fuck for that mean?
I'm spring cleaning all of the fuck boys out of my life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
THAT HOSPITAL MADE ME REALIZE THAT I'M BISEXUAL
Remember that guy that walked around our house naked with a boner wearing nothing but his winter coat? Well, he has a kid now.
You know, normal sex stuff involves shitting your pants. If you do it right.
you're not celebrating your 21st birthday right unless you give a male stripper a hand job, flash the bartender, and win a free vibrator.
Like sorry your dick won’t suck itself?
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