i'm officially boycotting relationships. hello random hook ups and treating men like meat.
she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
Oscar is the man. He keeps getting pictures of hot nude women with messages in spanish saying "i hope you like it" sent to his phone
whose oscar?
the baller who i guess decided to give out a fake number at the bar last weekend. luckily that fake number was mine. i have enough porn to last me until next month.
He's paying me $45 to clean his room and $55 if i find the oxy that he lost.
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My drunk body wants to fuck you so bad, but my high mind is telling me it's too much work. I think I'm just gonna stay home and eat some Mac and cheese. Sorry.
Homecoming wouldn't be the same without all the drunk old people puking on the street.
I'm lying on the floor in the back room praying my boss doesn't come to work today.never again
U took a sewing needle to his nipple
Psshh,
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
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Hey, if I can't get it and you're still alive, can you get the glass out of my foot? Happy Sunday.
It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary
You are not going to get a pat on the back from me for not fucking that 40 year old again.
Well ill be drunk so just come find me. Its like where in the world is Joey San Diego
After a while I was so wet that I started crying. HE MADE ME SO HORNY I WEPT.
shut up and let me use my vagina as a weapon of self destruction in peace!
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