I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
Obama just said the words "we're all in this together." I wanted to start singing high school musical
they could make at least 3 episode of "i shouldn't be alive" out of my weekend
I'm sorry i'm just too high to handle anything besides pirates of the caribbean right now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
My vagina has officially become a vortex for sexually confused frat guys.
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
Dear Penis Owner...our records show that you are overdue for servicing...please contact our friendly associates to schedule a thoroughly satisfying experience today...operators are standing by...
I don't think the TSA would be too happy. Who knows if three ounces of lube will be enough for us?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You woke up, mumbled something about forgetting to lock the truck at work, slapped my ass, then passed out again...
I walked in on him fucking my best friend. I think we've reached the point of following each other on twitter.
It's 2:10 am I am sprawled on the floor of the kitchen drunk and eating cold chicken wings come help
My purse is like an anchor I can't move I am sliding around like an over turned turtle send help
This floor is really dirty send a maid if you can
That was a very uncomfortable conversation to have without pants on. But his mom was pretty cool about it.
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
Okay, I just reached peak living alone
I ate a piece of chocolate cake while jerking off
Randomize