her vagina probably looks like a grenade went off in a deli
IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
Not only did a random toaster end up in my house last night, it's also full of skittles.
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I'm at the VFW tonight and the shot special here is straight 151 for 2 dollars. They must hate our livers
Do you think county jail has a Groupon?
I wanted to make fun of someone saying that to an untrained ear, skrillex is blah blah blah. But it was too soon after they said it. And now I can't find it. These are real problems.
I ended up in bed with a man from London in a sorority wing I am not apart of. Tequila fucks you up
Just give me 5 advils and some sunglasses and I'll knock out on this couch no problem.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you weren't there so I had to flirt with him on your behalf
In order to save time, dignity and liver damage, wanna get naked?
We could never date. He doesn't drink and he won't bring me tacos after sex. He's on that healthy life bullshit.
just so it's not awkward when you get here, you and my dog have the same name.
Hahaha nice
With each thrust he'd whisper "like a ninja." Should I be flattered or appalled?
Guy just rode past on a lowrider bike smoking a blunt, I want his life
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