What do you call a girl with PMS and GPS?
A crazy bitch that WILL find your ass!
and everytime i fart i feel like in your heart, you can hear it
This girl told me I had the balls of an infant..I replied by saying her vagina looks like Stargate.
Seriously, stop peeing all over the toilet seat. It looks like movie theatre butter.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just opened the overnight bag i packed at 2am last night. Apparently all i thought id need was a handful of quarters, mascara and one sock
Have invented new cocktail. Any flavor of crystal light and vodka. I call it "I am going to die alone"
The beer-amid has reached five feet. Caitlyn has a taser. GTG
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
last karaoke night = doing dmx songs with a guy who threatened to stab me. so yeah I'm coming out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hypothetical question. Say I was bleeding profusely, close to your house, and needed a place to go to clean up and perform minor surgery on myself. Like now.
I just tried to brush my hair with a can opener. Who gave you that brownie
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
I literally woke up walked into the bathroom, threw up and died this morning. Then went to my 8am.
I'm not going out, it's sweat pants and gallon vodka night at my place and I'm the only one on the guest list.
This is because you lost at fooseball isn't it?
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
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