It's like she bought one bad life decision and got one free
I sat in the mc D drive thru and refused to move till the chick gave me her number
One of my students just said I have "big mommy parts". Even third graders know that my tits are too big. God I love em.
Im drunk and they're making me play quiet game. Im scared. Baptists are here
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Remember the time we were horrifically hung over, went to mcdonalds, an you merely felt the weight of the mcnuggets box and knew there was an extra?
like it was yesterday
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
I'm drunk at 3:28
I'm jealous as shit at 3:34
I could teach a class on "expressing your thanks through photos taken of yourself in the shower"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Something about finishing sexting a guy and him going "well. I have to get ready for Passover now" really makes me rethink my life choices
Not sure how but he broke three of his fingers while giving a blowjob. How does someone that accident prone survive to adulthood?
Hopefully they won't bring up last year's Christmas party. I kind of predicted my great aunt's death...
Well now you know my birthday fantasy: gangbang consisting of men wearing NPR pledge t-shirts.
His dick is a spiritual experience and meditation is very important to me.
I’M PUT OFF FROM FOOD RN BC EARLIER I GOT SOME WATER AND I WAS 4 SIPS IN WHEN I NOticed A FUCKING BURGER KING F R Y IN MY D R I N K
Randomize