i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
i just spent the last half hour thinking about my totally irrational and intense hatred of wedge flip flops.
you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
You'll be proud of me
Who did you not have sex with
Damn it...you know me too well
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
Saw the college gyno today. It has now been medically confirmed that I have a perfect vagina.
they won't let me drive with my sombrero
Our sex bag has now been upgraded to sex luggage, with wheels, and now features a first aid kit. Game. On.
Your a horrible friend, i only tried to do the right thing by moving you off the floor.. that was not an invitation to puke all over my bed and attempt to use my dog to mop it up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You just sat there and yelled "I JUST WANT TO RUB MY NIPPLES"
And then we were riding the keg in the pool like an 8 second rodeo...naked.
the breathalyzer kept saying danger. we made our new slogan danger we need more shots
I left her alone for a few minutes and she's already using a guy on his hands and knees as a chair while another guy is serving her margaritas.
You took your shirt off at the bar, handed it to a girl, and made her wash your dirty shirt on your washboard abs
tuesdays get the best of me...
I refuse to take any type of advice let alone love advice from a motherfucker who is missing 3 fingers from a Fucked up masturbating accident.
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