do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
I feel like dying is the new "adopt an african baby"
i am devastated. she was DTF and I was about to puke, i told her to wait outside my room for a second. Puked. Passed out woke up, she was gone. Found puke stains on my keyboard that seem to spell out youporn....
If its allowed to Tornado at 830am then Im allowed to have a beer and a cigarette at 830am
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
I don't go on dates. I watch tv and play with dicks. dinner is a situation.
I command you to take a shot and dance like the pretty little gay boy you are.
I broke up with him in the bar & then asked him if he wanted to have a contest to see who gets the most numbers. I say I took that break up well
I taped a pair of scissors and a coupon for a waxing on the door. He gets to choose.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I would love a rich wife. Then I would be like a gym teacher or some shit. Bigfoot hunter maybe.
We need to make tonight low-budget
Is this your way of suggesting flasks?
We're now referring to our nightly Skype time as "strokes of genius." Long distance sucks.
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
I can't trust your balls anymore.
We got caught fucking on the couch while I was in my Godzilla onesie.
Randomize