I am spending my child support on dildos
ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
okay so using the row boat as a giant snow sled probably wasn't the best idea.
Joey just asked me if I ever got anything stuck in my vag.
was it embarrassing when you had to say yes?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like someone was just looking at my memory and took out an eraser and was like "nope he doesnt need that"
By the end of the cruise, there was literally nothing in our room he hadn't peed on.
My god. We'll be gay porn millionaires.
You drink it until you puke in a vent one time and it's ruined forever.
We 6 way cheers-ed with French fries last night, hammered, in the booth.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She waited 7 months to break out her comicon costumes. I was only mad it took her so long. I fucked an elf last night and strawberry shortcake the night before!
Dude you spent 20 minutes on the phone with dominos answering machine trying to order a pizza
I'm eating tortillas right now. Like not cooked tortillas. Someone is playing the guitar. Man with bandana.
It's the 30 sec rule.... the worst that could happen is I could die
Haha. I have resting bitch face. He has I want y'all to die face. It's a subtle difference
I spent half my night explaining that i'm in an open relationship to the guys that I liked, and the other half of the night explaining that I have a boyfriend to the guys that I didn't like.
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