Billy Mays died!
I know. And the US is beating brazil...what's wrong with the world?
he thought i was passed out so he proceeded to jerk off while i lay on the floor next to him
well now i know if i ever need to drive puke and talk on the phone at the same time i can
She said, "I don't really go out much, but my husband recently cheated on me" and I don't remember anything after that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They both just did a shot, head butted each other, did another shot and then slapped each other in the face. These could be the two guys we've been looking for all our lives
Do you think I could put your penis on reserve for tonight or tomorrow night?
I found a ladder. I don't know where I am. Gonna climb it. I feel like aladin
Another Sunday, another 100 chicken nuggets
I recommend you throw your keys as far as you can in one direction, your phone as far as you can in the opposite direction, and hold on.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My way of showing team usa support, bronze: handy silver: bj gold: home run. God, I'm patriotic
The number of males in the usa getting circumsized are decreasing. Keep this in mind when we become cougars
Seriously, I woke you up with tacos, I think I deserve the best girlfriend ever award
This girl is wasted dancing to The Final Countdown. She's grinding on a guy who came to the bar in a track jacket and a wife beater
She showed up at 4:30 in the morning HAMMERED, stripped, demanded sex, then after 4 failed attempts stopped me mid-thrust to tell me she thought we should be fucking for a cause, like animal rights. Process that for a second. She wanted us to be fucking for animal rights.
You said too many real things and now I need to crawl back inside my protective fort of sarcasm, being an asshole, and sass
Randomize