He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
Thank you for leaving pool of vagina on my girlfriends carpet.
We've had the 'life would be so much better if we were both lesbians' conversation too much for that to be okay.
Heating the house with the oven may not be safe but at least it's always preheated
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Aw c'mon. You have to see if the spinning penis rumor is true.
She's walking around topless with a bottle of red wine, crying and singing showtune ballads. This is actually an improvement.
Yeah. I've decided no relationship can survive me shoving my boobs in the guys face
Look, if I'm too lazy to put any effort into sexting, you better believe I'm too lazy to put any effort into dating.
female sloths literally scream when they want sex and can be heard up to 700 meters away
i think i might be a female sloth
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
I shit myself when I came, don't have flu sex
His sister hates me so I took his virginity on her bed
whatever. i just wanna get "forget my own name" wasted
no. you need to know your name so people know where to return you when you get lost.
One can only be this extremely wet once a year and I feel like I'm bitch slapping god by not using this gift he has bestowed on me.
Our livers are going to hate us.
It's okay, they're regenerative. God wanted this.
Randomize