listen. just hotwire a car, take off the license plate, make up a new one on a sheet of paper and go the speed limit. i do it like, at least 3x a week.
shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
It was honestly like finding a clitoris in a haystack.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i was able to set 4 alarms to make sure i woke up in time for class but i couldnt take the open beer out of my pocket before i did cartwheels down the hall...
She actually was beyond drunk but she for some reason kept calling herself a demigod and made me drive her to a bookstore
At some point during thanksgiving the image of me pooping on ur moms chest will come to you. Your welcome!
Actually I more feel like I'm on a ship about to grab the holy grail off an island
The ship is me being high the holy grail is some profound idea I'm about to have
I think I'm just going to go like every guy on tinder who has a jetski. I'm doing this for us, Summer is coming.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So was this before or after he cried about trump?
After
Only thing that feels right is being horizontal in the fetal position
All I ever wanted was my bed, Tylenol, and total darkness. Instead I had a pervert with porno posters who blares german rock calling me tootsie pop. How was your saturday night?
Turns out my GF and my FWB have a mutual friend. Yada yada yada, I need to crash on your couch
tell me about the fingering
Tbh I’m not a vibrator enthusiast
But I am godly
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