Texts From Last Night

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  (850): View more from Florida

  It wasn't awkward until he started humming the Rocky theme song in the middle of fucking

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  (850): It wasn't awkward until he started humming the Rocky theme song in the middle of fucking http://tfl.nu/828r
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  (646): View more from New York

  Turns out he's not gay. He just didn't know how else to say he's not into me. He just hit on my sister.

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  (646): Turns out he's not gay. He just didn't know how else to say he's not into me. He just hit on my sister. http://tfl.nu/1b2r
  Replies (15) Good night (495) Bad night (3962) Order T-Shirt
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  (415): View more from California

  How am I supposed to spread my seed with you "modern women" and your birth control?

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  (415): How am I supposed to spread my seed with you "modern women" and your birth control? http://tfl.nu/y9i1
  Replies (27) Good night (1485) Bad night (3559) Order T-Shirt
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  (727): View more from Florida

  Katie is reenacting me jizzing in her eye via emoticons...

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  (727): Katie is reenacting me jizzing in her eye via emoticons... http://tfl.nu/8jcz
  Replies (16) Good night (4471) Bad night (873) Order T-Shirt
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  (630): View more from Illinois

  I wish I had my own personal Asian lady that lived under my bed so that she could wax my eyebrows and give me a pedicure whenever I wanted.

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  (630): I wish I had my own personal Asian lady that lived under my bed so that she could wax my eyebrows and give me a pedicure whenever I wanted. http://tfl.nu/87dj
  Replies (84) Good night (7859) Bad night (1321) Order T-Shirt
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  (484): View more from Pennsylvania

  this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.

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  (484): this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal. http://tfl.nu/sd8q
  Replies (16) Good night (3724) Bad night (640) Order T-Shirt
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  (703): View more from Virginia

  threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.

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  (703): threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased. http://tfl.nu/r0ay
  Replies (14) Good night (853) Bad night (3957) Order T-Shirt
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  (203): View more from Connecticut

  they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.

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  (203): they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures. http://tfl.nu/t4cj
  Replies (3) Good night (4183) Bad night (514) Order T-Shirt
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  (856): View more from New Jersey

  2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.

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  (856): 2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over. http://tfl.nu/sc8m
  Replies (8) Good night (3618) Bad night (915) Order T-Shirt
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  (508): View more from Massachusetts

  After much deliberation I've decided to name my penis "Arthur", hope your mom's surgery goes well.

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  (508): After much deliberation I've decided to name my penis "Arthur", hope your mom's surgery goes well. http://tfl.nu/5wox
  Replies (11) Good night (3384) Bad night (811) Order T-Shirt
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  (804): View more from Virginia

  Weekday college schedule so far: get high as tits. Watch Family Guy marathons. Repeat.

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  (804): Weekday college schedule so far: get high as tits. Watch Family Guy marathons. Repeat. http://tfl.nu/9gr0
  Replies (6) Good night (1621) Bad night (711) Order T-Shirt
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  (641): View more from Iowa

  IT WAS SO BIG. I FORGOT GOD MADE THEM LIKE THIS.

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  (641): IT WAS SO BIG. I FORGOT GOD MADE THEM LIKE THIS. http://tfl.nu/d7hp
  Replies (16) Good night (2348) Bad night (278) Order T-Shirt
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  (817): View more from Texas

  He looked at me like he knew me, and I looked at him like I had seen his penis before.

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  (817): He looked at me like he knew me, and I looked at him like I had seen his penis before. http://tfl.nu/79xu
  Replies (4) Good night (830) Bad night (190) Order T-Shirt
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  (231): View more from Michigan

  whats our policy on dating high schoolers?

  (1-231): View more from Michigan

  we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does

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  (231): whats our policy on dating high schoolers? (1-231): we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does http://tfl.nu/ul27
  Replies (7) Good night (1873) Bad night (345) Order T-Shirt
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  (612): View more from Minnesota

  At what point did you realize I was getting blown under the table during our dominos game?

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  (612): At what point did you realize I was getting blown under the table during our dominos game? http://tfl.nu/97sa
  Replies (3) Good night (863) Bad night (118) Order T-Shirt

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