I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
WHY DID I DRINK ALL THE INGREDIENTS FOR VOMIT?!
just bought miller high life, hungry man dinners, and a bottle of lube. you win life, you win.
This isn't the rejection hotline, is it?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Threesomes are so awesome. You even have company on your walk of shame :)
i think she is mad at you for trying to take a shit in the back seat of her car
so i woke up.. still drunk and discovered my roommate in the living room passed out dick-in-hand watching porn..
What did u do?
turned the porn up and opened the windows so everybody goin to class could see him..
nothing like celebrating the fact that you're not a father by trying to impregnate other women
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After four attempts, his condom would not flush. I had to remove it with salad tongs.
My mother just made an innapropriate gesture with a cucumber while grocery shopping at whole foods... Then she said "bitches love cucumbers" and all this time i thought i was adopted
You can't just beat off while driving someone else's car. Thats a rule
Thats your rule and this car is nice
Well, let's just say, I got that eye patch like we were joking about
He tripped and fell all the way to the ground and then stood right back with out spilling a drop of his 3/4 full glass of rum and coke. It was like watching something from the matrix
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
Randomize