Latenightwjoannablackberrywontletmespaceitknowsimdrunk
I peed while puking? Even better
Yes you most deff did. Ultimate multi tasker you are
Found my new morning breakfast spot. Hospital cafeteria. Nobody asks questions, they just assume shit went downnn
I'm at Lowes and I'm constantly looking for things to vomit in, just in case
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
I've thrown up twice at work. Just casually, in the mop sink. Then continued to make someone a milkshake. Want some ice cream?
Just had empanadas for breakfast while watching Wall-e with my yesterday's one night stand mother AND grandmother.
Phil and I agree that the level of sand in your vagina rivals that of many of the earth's largest deserts
Knowing that porn stars want to fall in love is the weirdest thing I've found to be beautiful recently. I'm so lonely.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My mom has a bong in her bathroom, but no air freshener.
He sang a ten minute song about me sitting on his face and eating quesadillas. Pretty sure I have to marry him.
Question: have you ever spent your Tuesday evening helping your one-night-stand create a resume? Because I have...
I told you naked hot tub wrestling would turn bad now one of us has a gash on the head and another a black eye
Other than the whole stab wound in my leg thing, today was pretty good. The nurses all loved me and gave me a sandwich and juice.
I told him he had to put his dick inside of me at approx 1159 to ensure it was birthday sex. i was 19 when he entered me.. came out 20. winning.
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