afterwards we were spooning and he said he wished he was a kangaroo so he cold put me in his pouch and keep me forever. I left as soon as he was asleep.
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
You had sex with him even after he literally described himself as a "coldplay guy"? There's a line you just don't cross. There is a line.
i just put all of my beerlympics medals into my academic awards box. i would say they are my greatest achievement since college.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't really talk right now. I'm getting on a plane to Oregon to go give a guy a bj. I'll see you in three days.
She was kind of put off because I kept calling her baby my spirit animal and staring hungrily at her breasts.
I tried to find the bar, ended up at a car dealership. Then the alarms went off.
Your father is wrapped in a table cloth singing, "America Fuck Yeah!" You are missing the time of your life.
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His exact words: "I don't have anything you can't treat with antibiotics."
Found my bra in the fridge. See you in 10 mins. It's gonna be a good fuckin day!
Humming the Indiana Jones theme song as my hand makes its way to his dick.
I’m home.
I’m aware. I just dropped you off.
"WHAT IS THIS LESBIAN MADNESS"
He ate me out in a limo while we were driving home. I love bars being open again!
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