Bigbird is at the bar Im at. whats her name
Broke my phone, have no voice AND I was blackout by 3 p.m...I'm betting I had a great time.
is it bad if my mug shot looks better than my profile picture?
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Got a basket, 50 condoms, some candy, 100 plastic eggs & my bunny costume. Campus will feel my wrath in 2 weeks
This girl named her kid Rainforrest. If I die, just know it was from laughing so fucking hard.
You were hanging upside down on the subway with your feet in the stirrup handle bars. the children were amused.
I know it was you that I fucked last night... I can smell my disappointment all over the sheets
like he said he was barking at you while cumming in your face
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I seriously just caught my Pina colada from falling of a table perfectly facing up. I will now reward myself by finishing this one and then getting my 8th
Can you bring home bongs? Like all the bongs. I need bongs
Took my plan b at Costco today, sample Sunday for the win.
Seriously, why do I have a mortar round?
According to Joseph, last night I crawled into bed and told him to pretend I'm his French maid, and then started speaking with a German accent, and referring to his manbits as "ze greatest Weiner schnitzel I'd ever seen". Basically, last night was a roaring success.
Just saw a fat guy on a flower print moped. He's my hero.
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