dear santa what can i do with your candy cane?
If your 8 lb baby was ham it would serve 6-8 people
guess you're going to miss out on a groin massage and a frosty vagina
my parents are out trying to convince the local liquor stores to post "do not sell our daughter alcohol" flyers. i'm preping my defense now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
Her grandmother had a handicap stair lift. I just put her drunk ass on it and let her ride it up. Thank God for broken hips.
Every part of me is in agreement...but mostly my vagina
If it makes you feel any better, I had my finger up some guy's butt today... Dominatrix training, ya know...
fuck it. from now on whatever room i wake up in, i'm stealing clothes from. this walk of shame shit is too much without pants
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Btw. Being a stripper for a week without anyone knowing to pay off my school loan is no longer in my agenda.
Oddly enough I feel totally fine now. Clonazapam and red bull the breakfast of champions.
Honestly no idea how dad figured out i did all that gay porn unless he was looking at gay porn.
I just got dumped by my fuck buddy. Now I have to have sex with my husband.
we woke up when the front wall of the house caught fire.
She's celebrating a tinder-match-aversary and I'm not about that.
Randomize