so i woke up to her 8 year old asking for a bowl of cereal...
You just kept saying over and over "Tell me I won't do it." Someone finally told you you won't. You did. Welcome to herpes.
All I can tell you is you will need a rain slicker for tonight's festivities. Any clothes underneath would be highly frowned upon as well.
you left your shoes but remembered to take your vodka. i see where your priorities are.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
he was alternating between taking bites of butter and bagel. he said it was easier than finding a knife
He said he'd prefer a photo rather than discuss politics, I sent him a snapchat "conservative shorts 4 conservative man". He said "be liberal"
I don't trust his life but I trust his penis.
I can't remember the last time I saw a penis in person that I didn't see a million times on text first
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
He showed up in a Prius. I didn’t even wanna.... So I left.
Now the fun stuff starts.
Someone is losing a finger.
How was I supposed to know the accent was fake before i slept with him
Weird. And pubic lice are now endangered so your hairy balls can rest easy
Randomize