I call biggest shit show at the party. I welcome all challengers.
You ended at least 6 stories with "and that's why I don't snort coke anymore"
i dunno what you eat but your cum is all over my underwear and it smells like pretzels
He offered but I said no. I didn't think it'd be cool to accept cupcakes in the mens room of a gentlemans club.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This girl brought half a watermelon to class. I want to be on her level.
its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid
He ended up walking out of his bedroom and told me to look at the nonexistent fire he was holding in his hand. Im upset I didn't take those shrooms.
She had one drink in her cleavage and another in her hand. She kept rotating between the two by leaning backward and then sipping the one in her hand.
just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
should i save it for someone special or be a feminist and be like "my vagina doesnt define me"
Why did I see a weird snapchat of you barking at McDonald's last night?
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
Was about to close the deal last night until he said he hadn't seen the Taylor Swift video. So I made him watch it before I let him have sex with me.
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
I covered the puke with a shingle there's not many chunks. I think it will blend quickly.
Randomize