butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
Get your hand out of your ass!
how did you know my hand was in my ass? Guess where my other hand is..?
In your belly button
My breakfast consisted of a slimfast and an adderal. My fridge is like an insecurity buffet.
Don't really want to talk about it. You were right. She had a whole jar of toenail clippings on her nightstand that she chews on "when her fingernails are too short." Direct quote.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
no, literally. he fb chatted me and said "since you're online i figured we could bang tonight?"
at what point did you see referring to the bartender as 'the white precious' a good idea??
His best friend walked in while we were banging, turned on the light, yelled BURN, grabbed his computer to play the Thunderstruck drinking game, turned off the light and left.
Dude that bathroom stall was not tall enough to be doing lines in, guys kept peeking over and giving us high fives
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my mouth is as dry as a post-menopausal camel on antidepressant's vagina.
theres a note on the fridge that says "guess what i peed in" and a half-full bottle of apple juice front and center. why did you let him in the house?
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
Dude. I keep thinking about how I let a man gum my vagina.
Finally finished unpacking shit from school n found a bra with no idea whose it is... I miss college so much it hurts sometimes
I got so tired of my roommates fucking in the tub I took a shit in it. Surprise!
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