At some point I made a semi-conscious decision that i was okay with sleeping in my own vomit.
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
We started a mustache riot at white castle at 4 in the morning. Will explain in detail.
Please tell me why there is some girl tied to our toilet?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
But I feel like studying my flashcards during a blowjob would be rude...
He is like a dragon that makes me want to spread my butt cheeks, so he can fill me with hot fire.
He peed in the bird bath. Those birds are gonna be pissed
I don't care how sexy you think I look in my scrubs. Wanting a blow job is not a medical emergency.
Does it make me immature that I debated going to this baby shower stoned, or am I normal as shit and everyone our age are having babies too young?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's like an adderall Houdini. Right when you think you have a deal he disappears
These muscle relaxers obviously don't work because I'm harder than a fucking diamond.
How high?! We watched paid programming for 45 minutes before we realized it wasn't just a long commercial. So pretty high. The Bionic fish finder looks promising, though.
Lets get a boat first.
It was bad. U were calling my cat "kittiano" and playing her like a piano. Way too drunk my friend.
Do you think he’ll fall in love with me if I tell him I have a nickname for his penis
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
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