I just masterbated while imagining him getting hit by a truck. I have hit a completely unacceptable level of anger & bitterness. Help.
Did you get your crutches off the street sign?
she's unstoppable after she starts doing shots and yelling NANNER
Never thought I'd say this but the maple syrup flavored vodka probably wasn't our best idea
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You put your finger on my lips and told me 'the butt is nature's pocket'.
I don't remember that at all, but I stand by what I said
did you know gatorade and rum go really good together
Are you doing depressed science again
maybe
Please come and kill me with a brick you dont even have to be nice about it just smash myfucking skull in this is the worst hangover ive had for at least a week
My Wonder Woman lingerie has been defiled by man. I'm a horrible Amazon.
I'm supposed to nail the old lady at 1:30 so I'll see you at 1:35ish.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's drinking on a hospital bracelet, the fuck's your excuse?
So basically I really like drugs AND banging cops and it's starting to get complicated
did u drive by my house last night?
bc if that wasn't you i threw my bourbon bottle at the wrong van
I just loudly threatened to kill a self checkout machine
Considering we almost incited a riot on behalf of LGBT rights I have to say that was the best time for our moral compass to turn south.
I saw the president of my women in business club at the bar last night...I was gonna thank her for teaching me the business skills to create my own fake to get in... then i decided not
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