On a scale from 0 to 24...wait, 3 to 24, where 6 is the lowest and 12 is the highest, how freaking high re you right now?
hey what are you doing
hooking up with some marlborough girl. shes gorgeous!
i texted you because i like you, and i told my freinds you were my fiance. but sine we're not dating you're not cheating and i'm pathetic
You were asking people if they could pee on you while you shotgunned beers
is it bad i banged a 25yr kindergarten teacher last night?
No thats like a top 10
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
IS FOOTBALL GONNA SUCK HIS DICK? NO, IT IS NOT
He is the Donovan McNabb of stuff up his ass. Tell me that tomorrow. Too high to remember.
I made him sleep with a condom on and i passed out on the carpet with only a bra on.
I haven't seen him since I gave him a hand job in the hospital. I like to think I contributed to his speedy recovery.
It's all fun and games until you throw up hot cheetos in your drawer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
well, I yelled "the tribe has spoken!" at a boatload of people and then I walked home alone in the pouring rain at 1:30am. karma really is a bitch, yo.
you're the one asking for my vibrator at 4 in the morning so reconsider your life
Wearing rip off pants to a booty call last night was one of my most brilliant ideas ever.
Naw but when she was in the bathroom I threw the condom out the window and I'm pretty sure it hit some girl
Dude my doctor just legit got down on her knees and loudly begged me to do my pap smear
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
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