And now I'm afraid that I'm a pornographic eater.
next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
We have sex, then he cooks. It's like a fantasy.
The cab driver doesn't know where we can find an empire state building shaped dildo either!? What is wrong with NYC!?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My head. My head is the problem. Also alcoholism.
he asked me for a gerbil feeder full of alcohol
Why do the people I hook up with still exist after we're done?
i think i traded my wallet for a tim hortons gift card.
My adult sexuality and some of the best memories of my childhood collided like a Pee Wee Herman wet dream.
Elaborate
Strip Mario-Kart
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Operation "Inform her family she stars in a sadistic lesbian porn film" is in full effect. She picked the wrong guy to cheat on.
I saw a picture of my dad holding my legs in a kegstand. Town festival=success.
Also, being stuck with my family all week has made it very clear that I need to be drunk and I need to be fucked pronto
Elliott peed on my floor and slept in it lol that's a one line description.
Did I wash my face last night at your house? Where did my eyebrows go??
I woke up not knowing what state I was in. Turns out, people from Deleware are pretty helpful.
Randomize