before tonight, i was terrified of what tequila would make me do. but all it did was make me hook up with a movie star. sooo basically tequila's my new fave
also, I just found three random bruises on my knee. probably from when I was velcrod to the stairs
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
How much morphine is too much? Keep in mind that I'm going to my graduation dinner with my parents.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
when I said energy drinks I meant cocaine
What can i say, i'm an artist. I think deep thoughts. In between the homoerotica and pterodactyl noises
Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there
i think the sex is so good because i get a contact high just from fucking him
I just had a mental image of us riding a tractor through hell with one of those big guns mounted on top of it shooting at everyone while the indiana jones music plays.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i think ive crossed the line from sexually frustrated to sexually furious
My talents include parallel parking and over reacting about absolutely everything.. And drinking..
I couldn't even tell you how many times I've said "wrong hole" today
That was just an endearing nickname I called you before. I'm not gonna call you a filthy slut now that you are one, I don't want to hurt your feelings.
I think I just read the whole internet. Front to back.
You ever fart so hard it made you cum a little? A "friend of mine" wanted to know.
Randomize